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I am feeling overwhelmed on my friends page about the new baseball season (something I could really care less about) so I figured a basketball post would be worthwhile. Specifically, a top 10 of the worst of the “jail blazer” era.

Now in case you’re not familiar, there was about an eight year stretch where my NBA team, the Portland Trail Blazers, were basically a bunch of criminals playing together. You worried if any of them were violating their probation by hanging out with other criminals. It was an embarrassment.

Recently, the Blazers have cleaned up their act (which is great) but I was reminded of this past era when I was listening to the radio on the way home from

work yesterday (1080 the fan). They put together a top five of the worst Jail Blazers. I am going to put together a top ten list of the worst Jail Blazers and why. And just as a note, this is an “all time” list so it is going to include everything (even when they weren’t with the Blazers). As if we need to demonstrate that most of these guys had issues before and after they came to the Blazers.

So without further ado:

Honorable Mentions

18. Nick Van Exel
He just shoved a referee. As far as Jail Blazers are concerned, this is lightweight.

17. Jeff McInnis
Jeff McInnis got into a fist fight with Charles Oakley. The only reason this doesn’t get higher is because McInnis didn’t really get the chance to retaliate and thus was not suspended) and Charles Oakley was probably deserving of a beatdown.

16. Darius Miles
Darius is the last remaining of the Jail Blazer era and management is trying to move him. He called his coach, Maurice Cheeks, the “N” word and said he didn’t care if the Blazers lost 20 more games because Cheeks was going to be fired anyway.

15. Jermaine O’Neal
Jermaine O’Neal was cited for cursing at a police officer. Oh yeah, and he was also one of the main people involved in the brawl at the Palace.

14. Rod Strickland
Even though Strickland has kept it relatively clean, he was still cited for a DUI. Which is more dangerous than any of the other stuff so far so he moves up the list.

13. Erick Barkley
Barkley was cited for marijuana posession and criminal trespass for failing to leave the scene of a fight when ordered to by police. He should also be on this list for simply hanging out with Bonzi Wells who resides further down this list.

12. Dale Davis
Davis was tazed by Miami Beach police after an altercation that left him with a disorderly conduct and assault on a police office arrest.

11. Marcus Brown
Brown was busted for providing alcohol to minor girls. Still, only an honorable mention for Brown.

Just plain dumb awards

10. Dontonio Wingfield
Wingfield might still be in jail. I can’t find much on him since he went to prison for assaulting two police officers. He was also busted for driving without a license.

9. Damon Stoudamire
Stoudamire had several marijuana possession charges including the infamous “trying to sneak marijuana through the airport in aluminum foil” gag. You do realize that one of the key components of an airport is a metal detector?

8. Shawn Kemp
Let’s see: Several citations for marijuana posession. Also posession of cocaine and an unlawful handgun. He has also reportedly fathered a baker’s dozen of kids (and probably more)

The Referee’s Favorites

7. Rasheed Wallace
I love Sheed and especially what he transformed into but he hasn’t always been a model citizen. As is typical, we have marijuana possession. Let’s not forget threatening a referee on the arena loading dock (the same referee that was involved in the gambling scandal). Oh, and by the way, he is also the technical foul record holder for the NBA and had a rule that was basically created for him.

6. Bonzi Wells
Criminal trespass for failing to leave a fight. Swearing at his coach. Flipping off fans. Striking a referee. Yeah, he was an easy target for everyone (police, coaches, fans and refs).

Serious Issues

5. Gary Trent
I heard Trent is actually a semi-decent guy now. Too bad he has had three separate charges of assault. One of those charges: beating on his PREGNANT GIRLFRIEND. Let’s not forget him going into the Golden State Warriors locker room to confront another player.

4. Qyntel Woods
You know that thing that Vick is in prison for? Dog fighting? Qyntel did that before it was fashionable. We can include marijuana possession and driving without a license just for kicks here.

3. Ruben Patterson
Registering as a sex offender? Patterson can show you how (he can also tell you what the penalty is for not doing it). He was convicted of attempted rape of his child’s nanny. Let’s not forget the assault against someone who scratched his car and domestic abuse charge.

The Serial Offenders (and tragic wastes of talent)

2. Zach Randolph
Let’s list it all off here: Underage drinking his rookie season. Sucker punched Ruben Patterson in the face at practice. Skipped a game to go to a strip club. Currently facing a civil suit for sexual assault against a stripper. Driving Under the Influence. Was with his brother when he shot three people. Hey, at least HE didn’t shoot them!

1. JR/Isaiah Rider
This is exciting. Let’s start off with the fact that he abused a worker at a Jack in the Box. He also threw a milkshake through the window. Next, he kicked a female manager of a sports bar. Classy. The standard marijuana possession and possession of an illegally cloned cell phone. Get that? He was charging his calls to another phone. Why should he have to pay for his own calls? How about gambling in public? Check. Spitting on a fan? Check. Fined hundreds of thousands of dollars for violating league drug policy? Check. Unlawful firearm possession? Check. Illegal drug possession, disobeying a court order, evading an officer, providing false information and driving on a suspended license (all at once)? Check. Being arrested for auto theft? Check. Kidnapping and domestic violence? Check. Wait…KIDNAPPING? The worst part about JR/Isaiah? He was probably the most purely talented, exciting ball player out of everyone here. I wonder if he thinks about that sometimes?